a letter of time
thank you for your call last tuesday 21.2
I dont know if u will ever read this words
I couldnt answer the question about my love to u
maybe u reconized that my love will last forever
i finally found the next day your last email from '10 and thought
back than that i will never ever be allowed to talk to u again

u mention on the phone that i insulted u vocally back those days when we were 2gether
i m sry about every word that hurt u - nowadays i m glad that we broke up,
cuz i turned later worse in that case

i told u about my dream last thursday, but was to ashamed to mention
that one moment in my dream, where i felt pure love from your spirit
"It was kind of 'bedtime' and we all pupils chilled everywhere on any sofa in a big room,
which got a fullview panorma window to a beautiful beach - we both lied
head to head, we looked into each other's eyes, finally you grabbed my hand and we fell asleep"

i had and have sometimes dreams where a unknown spirit touch(ed) me or gave me a hug
and its pure love that i felt... now i know its always u

how u said, maybe we will c each other again in 17 years - i can not wait for it
22F23 yours spu

23F23
hi there / someone is thinking about u
this whole story is still mixing me up
and somehow i got the same barrier in my head
like back in '03 at the little lake where we went
at our first date at your place
endless thoughts with endless words but
zero plans to express my feelings
its a big win 4 me 2 know that U R
the only person who understand me
after 17 years of considerations i know that it
was better for you to brake up
how i told you i reflected myself over the years
Today i know that i dont deserve a woman like u
my bad behaviour from the past i finally pay with
emotional pain and my health... again: my head is full
of thought... but i cannot express it in the moment
maybe tomorrow...

​

24F23
i was to selfish
lol - this weekend is daddy weekend and
my little son is tictoc addicted, suddenly he watched a clip
where some people R taking a bath in mud - like we did in turkey '04
i said to him that i already had such a bath in mud with my x girlfriend
he asked with your name - strange thing
at home a grabbed out the photo album u made up for this holidays
and showed him the funny bath in the mud
also i searched for the last email again - it was the 11thMar'10
i checked my memorys ... i was to selfish
my relation to my girlfriend back in '10 was fading out and
like i did always before i seeked for your nearness
a year later i met my sons mum - but i define to her your status
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2vtslO2iNw